


To Grey And Back Again

by Gcgraywriter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Miscarriage, No Smut, Rainbow Baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:22:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25144621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gcgraywriter/pseuds/Gcgraywriter
Summary: After the loss of their first pregnancy, Peter and Luna learn to love and support one another as they step into the next phase of their relationship.
Relationships: Luna Lovegood/Peter Parker
Comments: 6
Kudos: 1
Collections: Summer Fling Fic Exchange 2020





	To Grey And Back Again

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KrysKrossZee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KrysKrossZee/gifts).



> If you are at all affected by the thought or details of miscarriage this fic may not be for you.
> 
> Prompt: Luna Lovegood and Peter Parker have been trying to start a family for a while now. They have failed to get pregnant a few times, and even lost a baby. Luna has been keeping this pregnancy a secret though, and has decided to announce it to Peter in a big way so they can celebrate.  
> Pairings: Peter Parker/Luna Lovegood.  
> Kinks: Hurt/comfort. Angst. Fluffy family scenes.  
> Squicks: I'm not the biggest fan of mpreg where the character is cis male but if the character is a trans man, that's fine with me. I do not enjoy smut and cannot read anything with penetrative action.  
> Additional Notes: Nothing to add. Just have fun with it.

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/187009200@N02/50083524031/in/dateposted-public/)

The wind billowed softly through the thin linen curtains as she lay in bed, thinking about Bowtruckles. It was a beautifully gentle afternoon, the clouds sailing peacefully by like ships down a river. Luna wondered whether there was more to that thought, whether Wrackspurts could use the clouds to move about the globe, only returning to the earth in the event of a storm.

She smiled as she rubbed her swelling stomach, feeling the life growing there, fluttering like a snitch from within. A profound sense of peace filled her as she daydreamed about the shoes, lined up in neat pairs in the nursery—the Dobby-shaped ones she had knitted especially. 

Peter would be home soon, and they could talk about the designs she wanted to paint on the wall. She wanted Nifflers, Unicorns and a Thunderbird painted on the ceiling, watching over their new arrival. She cupped her tummy again happily as she watched the yellow curtains sway in the air.

The colour began to bleed out of them as they turned grey. Luna sat up in confusion as the cornflower blue walls also started to fade. Moving to stand, a sharp, throbbing pain struck her lower abdomen. She bent over doubling as she tried to shield her stomach with her arms. She was losing it all over again.

“No, no, no!” she chanted in despair as she felt the wetness between her legs. Red was now the only colour in the monochromatic room. She tried to get up, calling for Peter even though she knew he wasn’t there. Alone and helpless against an invisible foe. She fled through the house, a trail of red following her feet until she tripped and fell.

~

She jolted awake, her cheeks wet and her heart racing. Colour surrounded her as the bright curtains, and cornflower blue walls remained unchanged around the room. A noise at the door distracted her as she looked over. Peter stood in the doorway, wiping his hands on the kitchen towel.

“Hey, you okay?” he asked, looking a little concerned.

She nodded as she wiped the tears from her eyes. “Just a nightmare,” she muttered. He moved into the bedroom and lowered himself onto the bed next to her after throwing the tea towel over his shoulder. He placed his hand on her rounding belly and smiled. 

“Can I… get you anything?” he asked sweetly as he stroked her stomach, and she brushed the tears from her cheeks. She closed her eyes as fresh tears fell and nodded.

“Some Gurdyroot tea, I think.”

“Lune, you know what the… the healers said. What about some chamomile?” She smiled and rolled her eyes before nodding in agreement. “Alright, you stay here, I’ll bring it back. Just stay… and relax,” he said before kissing her forehead and moving from the bed. His movements had the poise of a dancer as he rose with grace and speed. She watched him leave before sitting up, desperately trying to shake the dream.

Cramps made the underside of her stomach ache, something she had been told by the healers was completely normal. She wasn’t so sure after that dream; it had felt so real. Throwing off the blanket to get up, she froze, staring blankly as the white sheets bloomed with red. The room swam, and she gasped for breath as ice gripped her heart. “Peter!” she called, echoing her dream self. He poked his head into the room, the blood draining from his boyish face as he saw the mess.

“Oh, man!” he cursed, rushing to her side. “It’s okay, I got you,” he said as he dashed around, fetching her wand and bag.

The rest of the day faded to grey as the numbness and shock took over, only the red retaining its vividness in her thoughts.

~

Hours after returning from the Beanacre Care Centre, the colours returned as her head stopped spinning. The same bright yellow curtains and blue walls stood around her. With an almost irrepressible urge, she longed to tear it all down. How dare they remain unchanged and whole when she was neither? She stared forlornly at the vase on the window sill as night started to settle outside the window—the Irises and jonquils staring at her as Peter stroked her hair.

“Pansy and Neville sent them,” he whispered, following her gaze. She folded in upon herself as she looked away. She knew their meanings: sympathy and hope. However, all she could see was a white flower with a sunny centre, blooming beautifully - like she should be.

Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes and blurred her vision as she cupped her empty stomach. It was all her fault, she thought as fury and sadness battled within her.

“Mr Rogers and Mr Barnes sent their condolences as well, and Mrs Stark…” Peter whispered again as his own voice cracked with emotion. Luna gripped his arm more tightly. “Please talk… I know you’re not okay, but… are you alright?” 

She didn’t reply. How could she respond when she was so far from okay? She squeezed her eyes shut against the tears that wanted to start again as she held his arm to her chest.

~

She could hear him pacing almost soundlessly on the other side of the front door as she sat on the porch. Even with his spider reflexes and nimble grace, she could practically feel him pull against her gravity as he trod the floorboards.

The street was filled with the quiet chirrups of crickets as the moon rose above the rooftops. The night was balmy, but she clung to her mother’s threadbare shawl. Resting her chin on her knees as the swing seat swayed gently in the still air.

As soon as his feet paused in their tracks, she knew he had made a decision. The front door and then the screen opened as he cautiously joined her on the porch.

“Hey… I brought you tea,” Peter murmured, stepping closer with her mug. She tilted her head and offered him a soft smile before patting the seat next to her. He let out a relieved sigh as he rushed to join her, hot tea spilling over his hand in his haste. After swapping the mug to his other hand, he waved his burnt hand around, hissing in pain.

“Thanks,” she muttered as she took the offered cup, resting it on her feet without touching the liquid within.

They sat in silence for a while, Peter pushing the swing backwards and forwards gently with his legs. They had struggled to talk about their loss, both feeling too awkward to bring it up, lest they upset the other.

“Whoa, look at that moon,” Peter said admiringly. Luna glanced up and nodded, the moon always seemed bigger in America. She knew it wasn’t true, but it certainly felt like it was.

Untucking her legs, she placed her mug on the floor and cuddled up to him, enjoying his warmth as they swayed together. Peter rubbed her arm, squeezing it affectionately every now and then.

“Larb you,” she whispered as she hugged him closer.

“Larb you too,” he replied with a chuckle before kissing her head.

“I’m sorry,” she muttered as she tried to hold the tears at bay.

“Stop. No… You shouldn’t be sorry… It’s just… Aunt May said… it wasn’t meant to be this time,” he finished.

“How is May?” she asked, clinging to a change in subject. 

“Yeah, she’s good,” he nodded. “She wanted to come by soon, I said that you’d, y’know… let her know.”

She nodded against his plaid shirt, enjoying the scent of newspaper print and solder beneath the deodorant. It was an unusual scent combination; it hinted at something hard but also held an underlying sweetness like a metallic tang. She assumed it was from wearing the suit as often as he did.

She closed her eyes as she listened to his heartbeat. It was measured and strong as she slid her hand up to cup his neck.

“We’ll be alright,” he whispered as he kissed her head again. She nodded, knowing that it would get better even if she didn’t believe it yet. She tilted her head up to him and met his lips with her own. Her heart had completely shattered, but he was the glue that kept it beating. His webs held her together when she wanted to break. “Come on, the healer told you to rest,” he said as he tucked a stray tendril of hair behind her ear.

“But the night is so lovely. You can hear people's consciences singing,” she said as she listened intently to the crickets.

“Their what?” he asked with a laugh.

“Jiminy Cricket; he was a conscience,” she reasoned. He smirked and nodded back.

“Huh, that kinda makes sense.” 

“I do make sense sometimes.”

“I’ll have to owl Hermione and let her know,” he said. “Remind me again why your friends don’t have email or cell phones?”

“Our magic interferes with them, magic and technology rarely work well together.”

“I think we do okay… right?” Peter asked, and she nodded. “Your magic and y’know… my technology,”

“We do,” she agreed.

“Come on, bed. I’ve got to head to work early tomorrow, I want to show the boss some of my photos.”

“The ones you’ve taken as you’ve been swinging around?” Luna asked, interested. Peter nodded nervously.

“Yeah, I hope he likes them, We could do with the money!”

Luna nodded as they both started to stand.

“I’ve still got a bit of money left over from my articles with the quibbler, we’ll be alright,” she said soothingly.

She took his hand and led him back into the house, toward their bedroom.

~

Pasta bake had somehow welded itself to the dish as she scrubbed at it. She knew she could have taken her wand to it, but there was something therapeutic about doing things the muggle way.

The house was silent, Peter out with the Avengers doing something no doubt dangerous. Anxiety started to rise in her chest at the thought, but she pushed it down as she doubled down on the washing up, taking her nail to the left-overs. The hot water stung her knuckles, leaving them pink in the soapy water.

She heard the bedroom curtains rattle in the wind. She had taken a paintbrush to the walls and thrown away the curtains, unable to bear the sight of them any longer. Lavender now covered the walls and midnight blue curtains swayed against the windowpane.

It had taken some time, but they were getting there, and they would never forget what could have been, but they had to move on lest they become stagnant and resentful.

She watched through the small window as the trees swayed in the autumn twilight, like seaweed caught in an undercurrent. She stared, remembering the stream by her father’s house, where she had spent many hours collecting Plimpies and catching snails.

She missed England, with its rolling green fields and the cold nip that was almost always in the air. She missed the dull days where clouds filled the sky, and the wind rippled the grass giving the impression of a wide green ocean outside her front door. She looked out at the house a few metres away and sighed. She loved Peter and loved their life together, but she missed home with the same yearning in her chest that their loss had cemented there. Sometimes it was difficult to breathe around it, others she almost forgot it was there. 

She felt something press against her back as hands surrounded her waist. She cried out before she heard the familiar chuckle at her ear.

“Honey, I’m home,” he whispered as he pressed his lips to her neck and just like that, the yearning faded into the distance, replaced by Peter and his innocent charm. She smiled and sighed against him as he kissed her throat, turning her around in his hands.

She made a quick assessment of his suit before succumbing to his kisses. The red and blue suit seemed intact and almost clean as she ran her hands over the cool scaly texture. She grinned as he picked her up, hooking her legs around him as he carried her effortlessly to the bedroom.

“Peter,” she giggled. “When Mr Stark made this suit, I’m pretty sure this wasn’t what he had in mind…” She sighed as he kissed her again.

“Stark probably did, let’s test the theory,” he said teasingly before they disappeared into their own world, shutting the door behind them.

~

England. She smiled as she sat at the dining table, watching the watermill do its job through the window. She loved Neville and Pansy’s house. It still retained all the character of the working mill, but Pansy had turned it into a stylish home. You could feel the love as you entered, with the odd cuddly toy scattering the floor. Never really knowing whether it belonged to the children or the spaniels they kept. Neville rushed around, picking the toys up as she sipped her tea.

Oh, how she had missed actual tea. Americans could never get it right, she wasn’t sure whether it was the tea or the water, but it just never tasted as good. She hoped it would settle her stomach. She put it down to the portkey journey, it had seemed rougher than usual.

“It’s great to see you, you look well!” Neville said as he pushed the hair out of his face.

“Oh, Nev!” Ginny said, appearing from the living room, presumably only just arriving with Luna’s goddaughter on her hip. “People only say that when they think you’ve put on weight,” She rolled her eyes and laughed as she came around the table and hugged Luna. “It’s great to see you! You look so tanned,” she said as she handed over the little redheaded toddler to Luna’s outstretched hands.

“She’s gotten so big! How old is she now?” Luna asked, her eyes all for the beautiful child with bright hazel eyes.

“She’ll be two in April” Ginny replied before hugging Neville. “How old are Logan and Zinnia now?” she asked, turning her attention to him.

“Zinnia is fourteen months, and Logan is three in July,” he said, smiling proudly as he fiddled with one of the toys.

“I remember when Pansy was pregnant with Logan, has it been so long already?” Luna shook her head in disbelief.

“You’ve had your own things going on,” Ginny said, offering her a hand over the table.

“Where is Pansy?” Luna asked. Neville rolled his eyes,

“They’ve gone to visit Pansy’s parents. I’m still persona non grata, but they adore the children. Which works for me,” he added.

“And Harry and the boys?” she asked. Ginny rolled her eyes and smirked.

“You’ll never believe me, Harry has taken the boys camping with… Malfoy and his son,”

Neville and Luna stared at her in disbelief.

“I don’t know why you look so surprised!” she said to Neville. “You and Pansy getting together started a precedent. They’re almost inseparable now,” Ginny shook her head.

They sat in silence as Luna booped the little girl on the nose, much to the child’s delight. “But enough about me, how’s Peter?”

“He’s good. He quit his job at the newspaper, he’s now helping out with new Stark tech, it’s all very technological and fascinating.”

“Sounds interesting, Harry’s always trying to tell me about new muggle gadgets, but I don’t understand them.”

“You remember when he bought that little box of music?” Neville said with a smile

“Yeah, the mebox?” Ginny offered as she held out her arms for the increasingly fussy child squirming in Luna’s arms.

“No, the ucube?” Neville offered. Luna grinned, sipping her tea again.

“Yeah, it lasted about ten minutes before Ron set it on fire!” They all laughed.

The afternoon continued in much that same way as she listened to their stories and reconnected with that part of her life. She missed the cool air and the rain that now battered the windows.

She flinched as she rubbed her stomach, her acid was back. It had been coming back so frequently and for no reason. Neville caught her eye.

“Are you alright?”

“Just acidy,” she replied.

“Hold that thought,” he said as he jumped up. He moved through the house, disappearing into the greenhouse. He returned with some leaves that he added to a mug. Luna and Ginny watched as he added hot water and offered it to Luna.

“What’s this?” she asked, although from the smell she was sure she knew.

“Peppermint leaves.” he smiled. “I’ll get you a plant to take home. Getting rid of a plant will make Pansy happy,” They all laughed again.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Ginny asked, her face suspicious as she looked her up and down.

“Yeah, just feeling out of sorts, probably just portkey-sickness.” she shrugged.

“As long as that’s all,” Ginny warned before Lily pulled at her hair, drawing her attention away to other subjects.

~

She stood in the hot street as people rushed past her. Her heart was pounding as her mind raced through her thoughts. She was pregnant again and was almost full term. She couldn’t believe it. She lowered herself onto the bench and tried to take in the words of her healer.

May was as close to a British summer that New York got, the air moved around her in a cooling swirl as she cupped her stomach. Guilt and joy warred inside of her as she held the life close.

Her friend, the esteemed healer Crassula told her that it was what was known as a cryptic pregnancy, and had she not dropped by, she possibly would have gone into labour without noticing the pregnancy at all.

Luna was both thankful and sad that she had missed it. A surge of joy and tears filled her as she rubbed her strangely flat stomach. She was finally going to be a mother. There was so much to do to prepare for their new arrival and so little time. The healer had checked three times at her insistence, confirming that she was pregnant and that the baby was in perfect health and due next month.

She paused, how was she going to tell Peter? She wanted to do something big and dramatic and include all their friends. She sat and planned, all the while running her hands over her stomach, hoping to feel a kick or a flutter.

Suddenly, filled with glorious purpose, she decided to go to Avengers tower. She needed their help.

~

The Barton homestead was the perfect place, off the grid with lots of space and privacy from the outside world. The ideal place for an Avengers versus wizards quidditch match.  
Luna sat, watching as everyone interacted and felt both nervous and happy. She was in a field surrounded by everyone she loved in the world. Her father stood in deep discussion with Fury, which made her smile; she wondered what they were discussing, before turning her eyes to the makeshift pitch. Harry, Ginny, Ron, Draco and Dean floated in the sky with their broomsticks, waiting for the avengers to join them. They didn’t have enough people for a full game as only Sam, Rhodes and Wanda could fly.

She watched as they cheated and cursed their way to good-humoured victory. Peter was talking to Clint, who was king of the barbeque, flipping burgers and other things on the huge homemade grill.

“Are you alright over here?” Steve asked as he sat down next to her. She smiled and nodded. Steve was one of the only people that knew anything about the reason for the huge party. Him, Bucky and Clint.

“Just trying not to be obvious, how are you?” she asked as she sipped her cloudy lemonade.

“I’m good,” he nodded, “Do you think he suspects anything?” he asked, and she grinned, shaking her head.

“How could he? I didn’t!” They laughed.

“Laura’s made you both a cake and banner, just need you to do your magic and all will be revealed.”

She smiled and nodded, “I’ll do it right after we’ve eaten,”

“Hey, what’s buzzin’ cousin?” Bucky asked as he joined them, bumping Steve's shoulder, earning him a smile.

“We’re in cahoots,” Luna offered with a giggle. 

“I can see that Steve’s being an eager beaver,” Bucky added with a wink.

“Always, it’s not like me to pass the buck,” Steve offered back with a shy smirk before sipping his beer.

“Killer diller!” Bucky sat down and nodded to the rest of the gathering, “So when’s it going down?”

“After food,”

“Know what would be a hoot?” He asked, turning to Luna, and smiling. “If you waved your wand and made the message show gradually, see if he notices… someone will!” 

Steve nodded in agreement. “Someone will definitely notice, and if they don’t, we can drop hints.”

Luna smirked and rolled her eyes, they were like kids. Since telling them about everything, they had been completely invested in the plot. She pulled out her wand and waved it at the banner, the P in Peter’s name starting to appear from behind the empty sheet.

“I really ought to get me one of those things!” Bucky said, marvelling at the banner before looking back down at the wand.

“I’m not sure Ilvermorny takes mature students,” Luna smirked, as Bucky pretended to be offended.

They laughed and continued to talk as Neville’s children ran with Lily Luna and Hugo, Pansy and Hermione sharing a delightful talk with Wanda a short distance away. Luna smiled, knowing that soon she’d be able to sit and watch their little one running around. A small tear came to her eyes as footsteps approached. Peter grinned at her as he offered her one of the burgers from the grill.

“Hey, Clint said you needed this, you got the first one.” She took it and smiled before nodding to Clint on the other side of the yard.

“Hey Queens,” Steve said in greeting, offering his hand.

“Mr Rogers, great to see you, sir,” Peter said, shaking his hand then offering his hand to Bucky too. “Mr Barnes, you guys good?”

“Swell,” Bucky offered with a knowing smile, “How about you?”

“Yeah, swell,” Peter nodded with a smile, but his eyes looked around as if noticing a trap.

“Come on, Buck. Let’s leave the young ones to it,” Bucky grinned and nodded as they went and joined Neville, Bruce and Scott on the steps leading to the porch.

Luna picked at the bun of her burger and tried to hide her smile. “Great party, isn’t it?” she said with a smile.

“Yeah, it’s great. Listen, my spidey senses have been going crazy since we left home. Is everything alright? I feel like I’m going crazy.” 

“Don’t worry, you’re just as sane as I am,” she said before taking a bite of the burger.

“Now I guess I ought to start worrying,”

“Perhaps, but we’re with some powerful witches and wizards and your friends too. We should be… swell,” she said, adding a grin at the word. Peter raised his eyebrow at her and smiled. She pushed the last of the burger into her mouth before he spoke again.

“Think you’re spending too much time around Steve and Bucky, They’re a bad influence.” She giggled at the absurdity as did Peter a moment later. “Come on, join the party,” he said, taking her hand. He pulled her close and kissed her deeply before holding her close.

“I larb you,” she laughed. Peter looked at her and grinned.

“I larb you too,” He picked her up and swung her around before leading her into the crowd. “I need one of those burgers, they looked so good.” She nodded as she followed him, her pale dress floating in the sudden wind.

“Hey, here’s the love birds, congratulations,” Clint offered with a broad smile before looking down at the burgers again.

Luna felt her heart in her mouth as she paused.

“Thank yo… Congratu…huh?” Peter asked.

Luna watched Clint’s face as realisation dawned on him.

“Sorry, what?” he said, pointing to his ears with a wince.

“Congratulations?” Peter asked again, “What for?”

“Sorry?” Clint tried again. “I really must get these upgraded to some Stark tech,” he said, tapping the hearing aid.

“Hey, What’s happening?” Ginny asked, “Are your burgers up yet?”

“No, erm yeah, Yeah!” Clint turned around, calling people to get their burgers.

“That was weird!” Peter said with a frown, as he looked back at Luna. She nodded and smiled. A look of confusion covered his face, and she wondered whether he was haunted by their loss. She glanced at the banner and smiled before pulling him in for a hug.

“Take a look at the banner,” she said softly, pulling away and watching as he read the sash above them. His face cleared as he read the words, stumbling backwards with shock as it sank in.

Harry, who got knocked into by Peter, cried out before his eyes too caught sight of the banner. A cheer started up within the crowd as Peter's eyes read and reread the message.  
‘Peter, We’re Pregnant,'

His face became red and blotchy as he looked at her and her stomach. He stepped closer and stroked her face and abdomen so gently as though he thought she would break.

“Are you… really?” He croaked to her, barely audible over the crowd, cheering them on. She nodded, tears streaking her own cheeks.

“Very pregnant,” she replied.

“When are… when do… what's the… the due date?” He stuttered as he looked at her still flat stomach.

“in about two weeks,” she chuckled.

“Two… weeks?” He stepped away and ran his fingers through his hair, “Weeks?” he repeated “But… you’re not… How?”

She laughed and pulled him close. “I’ll explain everything later.” 

He nodded in response as he grabbed her and pulled her into a fierce hug. “I can’t believe it, You’re going to be a mom!”

“And you’re going to be a dad.” He let out a nervous breath through his lips before laughing and squeezing her tighter.

“So that’s why Mr Barnes said ‘swell’ the way he did, did they know?”

“I couldn’t organise it all on my own. Steve, Bucky and Clint helped,”

“Official congratulations this time.” Clint offered with a sheepish smile.

They all laughed as they celebrated into the evening, Peter never once letting go of Luna’s hand. Luna cupped her belly and smiled. She couldn’t wait to be the family they had been waiting far too long to be.

Epilogue –

Pandora May Parker was born at 16:48 on June 21st, weighing a healthy six pounds and seven ounces. Mother and baby are doing fine. Father is still shellshocked... But happy.


End file.
